How to get to my house from the north
Road directions
- Come into London on the M40 (signposted London South and West).
- The M40 will turn into the A40. Watch out for the speed cameras for there are many.
Stay on this road underneath the North Circular and all the way into London. - Eventually you will see an enormous Car Phone Warehouse building on your left as you drive up a short hill with traffic lights at the top and bottom.
- Once over the lights get in the right hand lane.
- Stay in the right hand lane then get in the left of the two right-hand filter lanes. You should now be at some traffic lights and parallel with a Homebase on your right. If you're not you're fecked and will be lost in London forever.
- Turn right at the lights. Keep left and go straight head. You are now on Old Oak Road.
- When you come to a crossroads go straight over. There is a pub called The Askew on the left. You are now on Askew Road.
- You will past a Co-op on your right. shortly after the road will turn veer left.
- Take the second right onto Ashchurch Grove, marked as a Cul-de-sac. There is a pub called The Orchard on your right.
- Drive to the end and park.
- My house is number 39 and has a lightrope on the balcony.
If you get lost then you should follow signs to either Hammersmith or Shepherds Bush and call me.